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So you’ve moved to Japan hopeful that the dating scene here will be ah-mazing and full of new excitement. You think you’ll find the perfect Japanese man for you right away and things will lead to a happy ending. Or just have some fun for a while. While that’s a great mindset to have, it’s time to get real. Most foreign women living in Japan that want a serious relationship need to put in more legwork than they might otherwise overseas. Shyness combined with language and cultural barriers plus the not-so-little matter of a global pandemic make dating an even more stressful situation than it typically is.
But luckily, we live in an era where you can find anything online—even relationships. A quick search online will show you dozens of different deai-kei (出会い系 online dating) apps, but how do you know what will help you find who or what you’re looking for?
Having been there, done that, I decided to do a quick poll of my foreign friends to find out what apps or sites worked best for them and what didn’t. 15 international women living in Japan gave the original rankings out of five stars when this article was first published in 2017, and five of that same group helped to update this ranking for the dating scene in 2020. It’s up to you whether to swipe right or left.
1. Tinder
One that doesn’t need an introduction. While most people are “just looking” on Tinder, if you’re actively trying, you can not only meet people to date, but new friends, drinking buddies, networkers and activity mates. I found a whole group of men and women to check out summer festivals with, so I can speak from experience when I say that Tinder isn’t just for hanky panky.
In 2020, Tinder began offering its global passport, normally a paid service, for free to all users. It enabled them to better connect and communicate, which for several of the ladies was a huge bonus.
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Tapple seems to be used for both casual dating and long-term relationships. A common feature of Japanese dating apps is a pay feature for men. While both men and women can create an account for free, men have to pay a fee to be able to send girls messages. A key feature of Tapple is the wide selection of search categories related to your interests.